100 things in 100 days...

In 100 days, I will be the rather exciting age of 30 years old. I'm genuinely looking forward to this; back when I was a student of 20, a clairvoyant I saw told me that by the time I was 30, I'd really know who I was. To be honest, although this my be a self-fulfilling prophecy, I think she was probably onto something and as such, I welcome this coming birthday with open arms. My 20s has been fun, mad, hard, exciting, heartbreaking and an all round Experience (it completely deserves a Capital letter!) and I'm looking forward to my 30s being a whole new Adventure!

To celebrate the countdown to the start of my third decade, I've decided to compile a list of 100 things which I would like to accomplish in the 100 days before my birthday. It's proving to be a little hard, as I've actually done quite a lot already, ie learn another language, live in a foreign country, fall in love, go white water rafting, to name but a few of my achievements. To be honest, some of these are things I've already done, in years gone by, but I'd like to do them again as an adult.

Anyway, I think I've done it, so here it is:

1) Write a list of 100 things to achieve in the 100 days before I am 30!

2) Use the exercise bike every other day - minimum 3 times a week

3) Get back to a size 14

4) Learn to knit something other than a scarf!

5) Learn to play a game I've never played before - a card game or chess...

6) Go to a city in the UK which I've never been to before

7) Get a new job!

8) Use Wii Fit every other day

9) Take a multi-vitamin every day

10) Continue with the http://solstice-to-solstice.blogspot.com/ blog every day

11) Read a new book every month

12) Get some dreads made and installed

13) Give someone a shave with a cut-throat razor

14) Get my 4th tattoo

15) Give up alcohol for one month

16) Blog at least once a week

17) Lose weight - a stone minimum

18) Start a knitting group

19) Take a dance class

20) Hoover my bedroom once a week - whether I think it needs doing or not :)

21) Visit the toy museum in Brighton

22) Visit the people I love and miss in Norwich

23) Attend a Torture Garden event in London

24) Remove dairy from my diet altogether

25) Have a photo shoot

26) FINALLY sort out the gubbins in my room which I no longer need/want/wear

27) FINALLY go to a car boot sale and rid myself of the above, and whatever does not sell, send to charity.

28) Volunteer at a local charity shop

29) Apart from regular trims to keep the ends neat and healthy, grow my hair out (but keep the undercut!)

30) Learn to use my hair curling tongs properly

31) Re-lace all my corsets correctly

32) Stop pretending that if I don't see them the show won't ever end, and watch the last 3 episodes of The West Wing

33) See both of my lovely cousins more often

34) Meet my second cousin Millie

35) Make home-made Sushi

36) Get another piercing

37) Start stretching up my left lobe

38) Plant a window box with exciting plants

39) Drink a green tea every day

40) Finish the scarf I started for Phil, finally

41) Do everything within my power to get Celia to have kittens again!

42) Watch Robocop!

43) Eat a twinkie for the first (and probably last) time

44) Meet Digital Femme!

45) Cuddle Phil for no less than 10 minutes a day (this was his request)

46) Teach Phil basic French

47) Send a message in a bottle

48) Make a time capsule to be opened 10 years from now

49) Join an extras agency

50) Go on a tour of the Brighton Sewers

51) Find a worthy cause and go on a protest march

52) Learn how to tie a tie

53) Smoke a cigar

54) Get my Etsy shop up and running

55) Do some yoga daily

56) Cut back on the amount of caffeine I drink

57) Come off my medication if my doctor thinks it is wise

58) Have a full health checkup

59) Visit an art gallery I haven't been to before

60) Drink more water

61) Drink a pint of real ale

62) Go to a live sporting event

63) Make a batch of jam

64) See my parents

65) Tell Phil I love him every day (which is a bit of a cheeky one, as I do that anyway!)

66) Perfect the vegan fudge recipe I found

67) Watch a sunrise over the sea in Brighton

68) Watch the sun set over the sea in Brighton

69) Visit a palmist

70) Go down the helter-skelter on the Palace Pier!

71) Attend a church service

72) Get a full body massage

73) Visit a stone circle

74) Take a walk under the full moon

75) Have a picnic on a roundabout

76) Polish/clean every pair of shoes I own

77) Read vols 1-3 of the Books of Blood

78) Learn to crochet

79) Build a sandcastle

80) Climb a tree

81) Do something completely spontaneous

82) Have an old-fashioned afternoon tea

83) Go on a trip where you turn left, then right, then left, then right an so on!

84) Get the bus to Devil's Dyke

85) Have a day trip to London

86) Go to the zoo

87) Start the New Year with a BANG!

88) Do a proper 3 day detox

89) Avoid losing phone or keys (yes, very good Phil!)

90) Visit a thermal bath somewhere

91) Buy a nice pair of high heels...

92) Learn to walk in these high heels

93) Have my hair crimped!

94) Visit a castle I've never been to before

95) Visit a cathedral I've never been to before

96) Make at least one contribution to the house in preparation for the Zombie apocalypse

97) Get at least 8 hours sleep a night - AT A SENSIBLE TIME!

98) Re-read any Shakespearean play which I studied at Uni but didn't get to appreciate

99) Get a pen pal in a foreign land

100) Celebrate my 30th birthday in STYLE!

I will revisit this post at my birthday and we'll see which of these I've managed to do and how well!

My January 2010 horoscope...

Your calendar overflowed with activity last month; so you didn’t get as much R and R as you would have liked. Take the first two weeks of the occidental New Year to nurture your own sweet self. Impose a strict personal curfew. Get a minimum of eight hours of shuteye every night. Cut back on coffee and cola. Boost your immune system with a daily multi-vitamin. Take a ‘mental health’ day from work and treat yourself to a long overdue three-day cozy weekend at home. Rent a couple of comedies. Start (and finish) that book you’ve been meaning to read. If you must travel, be extra vigilant until the 15th. Expect delays. If you drive a vehicle, don’t postpone tune-ups and oil changes. Double-check the spare tire in your trunk. Is it fully inflated? Or just barely breathing? Have you made your New Year’s resolutions yet? If not, don’t fret. Use the time over your long weekend to establish short and long-term goals for the impending, unpredictable Tiger year. Be prepared. The Tigers year comes bounding in on February 14th. Although planning isn’t a strong suit of Aries, now is the ideal time for you to hone this skill. Hasty action and poorly thought-out plans invite disaster in 2010. Also, be sure to include an updated budget that includes a ‘just-in-case’ fund. As the Ox Year comes to a close, maintain your momentum at work. Don’t take anything or anyone on the job for granted. Be on the lookout for potential business opportunities but avoid signing on the dotted line until after the New Moon on the 15th. Any ambiguities at work will become clear by the Full Moon on January 30th.

Sounds alright to me!

10 Books which I DEMAND you read - 2009

I have managed to read a great many books this year, thanks to being unemployed for the first time since I graduated. I read VORACIOUSLY. Sometimes I got my hands on a book which was so enthralling that I couldn't sleep until I'd read it all.

Looking back, a large majority of them were horror/thriller but that's because it's my favourite genre both book and film-wise, so if you're not a fan of the fear and chills this list may not be terribly interesting for you, sorry!

These, in no particular order, are the 10 books I have most enjoyed reading (or indeed, re-reading) in 2009. Homework for the next year is to read them yourself.

Rosemary's Baby - Ira Levin.

I loved the Roman Polanski film adaptation which I saw during my first proper Horror film infatuation in my teens but had yet to read the original book. I managed to get hold of a really nice second hand copy on eBay - a lovely green leather-bound edition of horror film stories from a long time ago. It's such a creepy story, beautifully written and very "visual" - it was one of the books I stayed up all night reading!

The Birthing House - Christopher Ransom.

Completely terrifying. A genuinely nasty ghost story written about the author's actual residence which was indeed a birthing house originally. Lots of "wait a minute, what the hell?!" and "oh my god, oh my god!!" moments. Equally, plenty of gore, disgusting sex and lots of death.

Cabal - Clive Barker.

I read this the first time when I was at school I think, borrowed from the local library and really enjoyed it. I found a copy this year in a discount bookstore and bought it as a friend had recommended Clive Barker to me as an author I needed to read (I've got Books of Blood vols 4-6 but haven't finished it yet, which is why it's not on this list, but they are ace). I'm so glad I bought it because I completely fell in love with it all over again. There's a film adaptation called "Nighbreed" which is...interesting but not anywhere near as good as the book so I won't suggest you watch it - just get the book and marvel at the darkness.

Abarat - Clive Barker.

BRILLIANT first novel in a series of 5, aimed at young adults, from the wonderful Mr Barker. Oh, how I loved this, and how I longed to run away there more than once and leave this world behind. I actually read the first and second of the novels (the third is out next year and I can't wait!) this year and was hugely impressed. There were plans to have them made into films under Disney management but (luckily) due to creative differences the project is not going ahead - quite frankly, they'd ruin it. The author's sense of the weird, wonderful, macabre and beautiful are all superbly mixed together and if you like him, I can recommend these books; if you haven't read anything by him before but like your fantasy and magic then I can recommend these books too. WAY better than Philip Pullman's Northern Lights stuff.

Angels and Demons - Dan Brown.

I have a powerful need to go to Rome now I've read this. It's the novel which comes before The Davinci Code in the time-line of protagonist Robert Langdon and it's cracking. Fast-paced and exciting, thrilling and a little unnerving. Whether you have faith in a Christian God or not I think it has a lot to offer and the characters are all well written and believable. I'd read this before seeing the film and while I enjoyed that (Ewan Mcgregor, how I love thee) I felt they'd left important chunks out. I honestly didn't really like TDC the first time I read it and if you were the same, don't let that put you off reading this. When I went back and re-read that one I enjoyed it a lot more...

World War Z - An Oral History Of The Zombie War - Max Brooks.

OK, I'll be honest, I LOVE this book. I got this in 2006 and I've read it over and over again. It's just brilliant and a complete must-read for anyone who likes the Zombies! First person accounts from the Zombie War, some heartbreakingly sad, others wry and satirical, some even hilariously funny - it reads which such authenticity that, as Simon Pegg comments, you worry that Max Brooks knows something we don't. I honestly can't recommend this book enough to fans of the genre, and am very happy to see that there's a film adaptation in the pipelines! BRAAAAAIIIIINNNNSSSS!!!

Breaking Dawn - Stephenie Meyer.

The fourth and (so far!) final instalment of the Twilight Saga - I don't care what you say, I love these books. I'm not going to waste time here explaining why I like them as I did that once before on this blog and I stand by what I said then. The final part explains a great deal, sees Bella and Edward getting married, having TEH SEX, becoming parents, and fighting (well, more or less) for their lives against the Volturi. Bella FINALLY becomes a vampire in rather spectacular "vampire-human-hybrid-baby vampire teeth caesarian birth" fashion and that's all good. Also, Jacob stops trying to rape her and finds someone else to love. No, I didn't buy my copy at midnight but I did by it in the week it was released :)

Nineteen Minutes - Jodi Picoult.

Thanks to my Mum working in a charity shop I get a lot of her books on a regular basis. I think I've read about two thirds of the work she's produced and some of it is good, some of it average and most of it has a genuine twist at the end. This novel, like so many of hers features court-room drama and characters which you vacillate between liking and loathing. But the main storyline in this is a school shooting in the same vein as "We Need To Talk About Kevin" by Lionel Shriver (which is utterly excellent and you must read) and it's this which gripped me. It's tear-jerking, heart-warming and it's easy to relate to the main characters. Good work.

The Bitch Goddess Notebook - Martha O'Connor.

A find in the local Oxfam Bookshop which I bought on a complete whim knowing nothing about the book or the author, but thinking it would be an nice, light, easy read. I mean, I'm not one for Chick Lit or "Holiday reads" but I thought this might be a nice change from the terror and the inability to sleep with the light off. It was that, but it was so much more. Gripping, bitchy, shocking and a real page-turner. Written for anyone who was ever an outsider at school and found the company of girls her own age a bore and a horror - which I was, and anyone who ever had a friendship bond so strong that you felt that nothing could ever break it - which I did (and still do).

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince - J K Rowling.

What kind of Slytherin Head Girl would I be if I didn't read at least one of these a year? I've read them all several times over and then some (yes, even the 5th and least favourite of mine) and I'm still captivated from start to finish. Before the film was released this year (which was incredible - dark, angsty, genuinely scary and OH DRACO, what a beautiful young man you've become...) I re-read it and loved it. I don't need to say more on the subject, other than if you haven't read them we may need to rethink our friendship, OK?

FLIPPIN' TEA LEAF!

Some fucktard stole my phone from the Odeon last night after the last showing of St Trinians 2 - The Legend of Fritton's Gold. I left it in the cup-holder on my chair, and even though we called it, texted it (asking them to call Phil) and I went to the cinema today, no-one handed it in. It's pretty clear that someone has made off with it and is going to send it to Envirofone or somesuch for a bit of cash; it's an old Nokia and really wouldn't be any good to anyone but me!

CURSE THEM! May they have a rotten Christmas and a grotty 2010.

On the upside, the film was very funny - not as good as the first one, but boy, David Tennant as a bad guy and Gemma Arterton as the ex-Head Girl - SO HOT!!

Ma Vie En Photos

Introducing, my new project in blog form:

http://solstice-to-solstice.blogspot.com/

Merry Yule!

Dear friends - a Joyful Winter Solstice to you all! *raises a glass of mulled wine to your good health*

Winter Wonderland!

The snow started falling in Brighton at about 10.30 last night, and within about half an hour it looked like a Christmas card scene outside our windows. I went down to the front door and peeked out - the street was rapidly disapearing under the flakes. I hadn't seen snow fall and settle so fast in...well, I can't remember when!

Within minutes, myself, Phil, Barnaby, and Alfie and Bob who'd come over for the evening had thrown on coats, scarves and gloves and were outside in the street playing. It was amazing! Snow releases pretty much everyone's inner child so there were snow angels, snowball fights and general silliness aplenty! There was something incredibly magical about being out late at night in the falling snow, being some of the first people to walk across the park and play. We headed down to the Level and ran around like kids in Narnia! Speaking of which, the Park Crescent had pretty much turned into C S Lewis' imagined land - stunning. This time of year always reminds me why I love living here so much :)

The snow is still here this morning, but it is slowly melting in the winter sun. Luckily, Phil took some snaps and video with his iphone - and here it is!

Adieu, mon frere.

My brother is a complete and utter fucktard. People of the internet, never, EVER let me forget this fact.

That is all.

Good Things and Bad Things

My sleeping pattern is completely, utterly S.C.R.E.W.E.D.

I'm becoming more or less nocturnal for the best part of the week, and this really can't last because it's messing with my head, my medication times and, well, my life! I've had sleeping problems on and off during my life since I was a late teenager; I've tried so many different remedies but I've got to find a way to turn the pattern back on it's head. Attempting warm baths, yoga, herbal sleeping pills and FORCING myself out of bed at an early hour in the morning, no matter how tired I am. Lets see.

In other news: Phil and I had a wonderful 2nd year anniversary :D He bought me a wicked, handmade, one-of-a-kind Steampunk Raygun necklace (made by the very talented Barnaby) and a SIGNED copy of "Who Killed Amanda Palmer" - YAAAAAAAAAAY! He loved the engraved Zippo I got him; "our" band is Muse so I chose a lyric from "Supermassive Black Hole" which is a fave of ours - "You Set My Soul Alight" mwahahaha! We had a lovely night out and lots of yummy food and wines. Brilliant, love him so much.

In even more news, it appears that we AREN'T going to Dartmouth this weekend after all. Well, my parents may be, but I'm not. Apparently, my brother is being disciplined at the moment for a crime more or less undisclosed and this means he can't attend the Ball on the Friday and they haven't decided if he can attend the parade on Thursday (Hmm. We'd been told this was on Friday too...) I have things to do on Thursday so I can't get down there, and to be perfectly honest, I really don't want to go now. He's just upset things AGAIN and caused my parents to row with eachother and well, it's the same old story. *sigh*

And in final news for today a string of good things: I've decorated the Christmas tree, bought the cats shiny new collars, I've found several things I thought I'd lost, my lovely friend Rachel has just moved to round the corner, and generally, I'm very grateful to have such wonderful friends. Oh, and Mum's coming down tomorrow to go shopping with me. Ace.

November in brief, and a tale of an Ex...

Right.

Lets get down to business, shall we?

Time for a quick catch-up. I'm going to bullet point it, because to be honest, a lot of it is not very interesting. My life has blurred into one long day, more or less, since not working leaves me with very little sense of what day of the week it is. I also have a feeling I've lived some days twice, but I do know that this is because I'm awake in the early hours when Facebook or Google tell me something like "it's so-and-so's birthday today!" and it still says that when I come back to it after some sleep. Confusing. Not very good for my brain, or sanity I'll wager. Anyway, I digress.

What's been going on then? Here is November, in no particular chronological order:

• Well, I now sign on every two weeks and get my jobseeker's allowance paid to me, which is nice.
• I stopped eating dairy - milk, cheese, chocolate etc. Not eggs though, eggs are NOT dairy.
• I saw New Moon with Phil and Rachel, and it was AWESOMES.
• I've read a LOT of books recently.
• We had an epic and very successful Hallowe'en party!
• Brittonito got a Facebook.
• I bought an AMAZING 80's prom dress on eBay for £16.99
• My most heinous ex-boyfriend, Mark, found me on facebook. Actually, this desevres to be written about in full rather than just being left as a bullet point....

*jumps down to normal text*

Right, this was by far the most stupid thing I've done a long time. I blogged about this guy on my old wordpress blog:

"Exhibit B – Was 6’2 with the spikiest jet-black hair you ever saw. He had a gorgeous face and a hideous temper. He had his nose, eyebrow, ears and tongue pierced and a tattoo on the back of his neck and was Angstier Than Thou. I fell in love. My parents HATED him. I actually met this one in a chat-room online, so goodness knows what I expected to get out of it. I certainly wasn’t banking on getting laid for the first time and spending 18 of the most complicated, turbulent, passionate months of my life with him.

The End – He was my partner in crime throughout my spiraling depression in my late teens and I think he probably cried and stopped more than I did and yet ironically, he left me when he thought things were getting too “intense”. Seven weeks later when I was back on my feet more or less he came crashing back into my life and I let him spoil things again. All told, I had the break-up I always expected from my First Love – about 10 months of agony and slow recovery.

The Lesson – Don’t date someone younger, angstier or more pierced than you."

The words are pretty glib, and certainly don't describe the horror of the bad moments, which began to outnumber the good moments really quickly. He was emotionally abusive and extremely manipulative and I'm glad to say that once I finally got over him, I never dated anyone quite like him again.

Occasionally, I'd wonder about him. One of the last times I'd seen him in Norwich was one afternoon in the Castle Mall, he stank of whiskey and was looking rough. He was 20 then and was dating a 14 year old girl. Yes, really. He still didn't have a job. He disapeared eventually and I stopped seeing him around, which was nice. I honestly thought that he was either in prison, or dead.

Some weeks ago when Phil and I went down to Portsmouth for his brother's 30th I got a message from Mark via facebook. It was pleasant, polite, well writen, chatty. So I did the ultimate wrong thing and added him as a friend, because, well, I was curious. We exchanged news and it actually seemed like he had changed for the better - well, it's not like he could have got much worse.

Long story short, when he realised that I was friends with some of his friends, including the half sister he's just found, he freaked and suddenly blocked me. Bear in mind that this half-sister of his shares the Dad that he would tell anyone who would listen that he had sexually abused him as a baby before leaving his Mum. I think he was worried that I'd mention it to his sister and I doubt it would have gone down too well. Honestly, instead of saying something to me, like "don't mention my awful lies from my teenage years and my terrible behaviour" he just blocked me, and then set about poisoning her to stop her from being my friend too. GODS! It was so juvenile it almost made me laugh! But in all honesty, it did make me pretty sad too for a while. How sad that someone like him doesn't really change after all :( It also brought back a lot of the revolting memories of the lenghts I'd gone to to keep him and make him love me, which lead to some nasty nightmares. *sigh* Anyway, it's done and my life goes on rather wonderfully just the same.

In other, better news, I am attending the Passing Out Parade for my brother in Dartmouth on the 11th with Mum and Dad. He's approached them again and even called me to invite me, so we're going to support him. I'm going because A) if I don't, it will just make things uncomfortable, B) I quite fancy a trip to Dartmouth with my parents. I even get to ride on a steam train like the Hogwarts Express. I know, I know, it seems so stupid, but ultimately it's a positive step for him and it will be nice for him to have us there - to show him that we;re not the awful family he makes us out to be sometimes. I'm not going to hold my breath though, this might be another moment of clarity which gets ruined again. But I'm going to wait and see.

Finally, tomorrow is mine and Phil's 2nd year anniversary :D :D :D :D Love him SO MUCH.

I live!

I am still alive, I promise. I've just been too busy and too full of words to actually blog any of it.